Fending off pregnancy in the PAW

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Lordiego
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Fending off pregnancy in the PAW

Post by Lordiego » Sat Sep 22, 2007 3:14 pm

So I did a search for "Pregnancy", "anti-conceptive", and a few other key words and came up with all sorts of lunacy about Zombies reproducing and the like.. but I couldn't really find a ZS stance or ideas on how to keep your zombie-fighting, PAW surviving significant other from getting pregnant in the PAW. There are a million and one reason why you wouldn't want a pregnant woman and eventually a baby in the PAW, I won't dweel on it..

Just because society ends and the world goes to hell, or the dead begin to walk, doesn't mean that the nookie with your loved one has to stop!

I thought about trying to keep a stash of anti-conceptive pills, but they only hand it out in three-month supply, and apparently every woman needs a specific kind or they might be ineffective.

Although condoms have a long shelf life, they don't last forever. And I imagine that rubbers would be quite the commodity in the PAW. And hmmm... finding the hmmm... extra extra large magnums I use might prove difficult during hard times....

So where does that leave the horny nuclear wasteland lover boy?
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Post by Ricky Romero » Sat Sep 22, 2007 3:37 pm

Good thread idea! I've mentioned it before on here somewhere, but I think if you have the means to aquire it, Depo Provera would be a great addition to a PAW supply stash. It works similarly to oral contraception, and is just as effective, but one injection will prevent pregnancy for 3 months. It also disrupts the normal menstruation cycle, meaning that she'll only have 4 periods a year.

Of course a stash of Depo will only take you so far, but it could get you and your lady-friend through the hardest parts of the PAW, namely the first year. After that, it's rhythm method or bust!

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Post by Shorty0969 » Sat Sep 22, 2007 3:45 pm

I imagine that the stress of the situation would go a long way in the prevention of pregnancy. A woman's body has a strange reaction to stress. But there are also plenty of other contraceptives: diaphragms, sponges, spermicide, rhythm method. Granted, these aren't all high on the percentage of prevention, but they are a start. And in a ZPAW situation, there are plenty of places to pilfer the pill. Nowadays, the dosage is so refined that most kinds will work for anyone in, again, a stressful situation such as this. But then again, I'm not a doctor, just a mother of 2 teenage- and 1 pre-teen daughters.
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Post by Ad'lan » Sat Sep 22, 2007 3:54 pm

Well, the rythem methord works.... in a not very effective way. Better than just doing it, but well. I'm sure there are a few posters on the boards now who owe their lives to the catholic church. :roll:

There are Abortificants in the Natural world, Tansy being the one that comes to the mind most strongly.

http://www.sisterzeus.com/Abortif.htm Has information about all these plants, and the uses to which to put them (and how), as well as lots of advice.

They recommend Penny Royal.

These abortificants work by inducing a period, flushing out any fetilized egg.



You could always get an IUD, they last for upto a dozen years. and are reversible.
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Post by BethDeath » Sat Sep 22, 2007 3:59 pm

Just do what I did and get your hubby fixed. :twisted:

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Post by jeepinbandtrider » Sat Sep 22, 2007 4:09 pm

Yeah stress does do weird things to women. I know my wife says she didn't have a period for almost a year when she joined the Marine Corps. The stress of boot camp and her initial schools is what she thinks caused it.
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Post by Ricky Romero » Sat Sep 22, 2007 4:12 pm

The problem with IUDs is the extraction should it be necessitated due to infection, inflammation, or material defect. I wouldn't want to do something that invasive in primitive conditions.

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Post by Vindex » Sat Sep 22, 2007 4:27 pm

Only one of the orifices will get 'em preggers y'know

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Post by Ricky Romero » Sat Sep 22, 2007 6:03 pm

Vindex wrote:Only one of the orifices will get 'em preggers y'know

Apparently, post-apocalyptic sodomy is an obsession of Vindex's. Read his story("Last gasp") in the "Art" forum. Here's a link to the page where he first made his fetish known. :lol:
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Post by DFWMTX » Sat Sep 22, 2007 7:06 pm

Isn't there some kind of infection one could get from feces being jammed up the ureatha during sodomy? I remember some post on the Internet (not by anyone here) about somebody being hospitalized for it. If that's the case, condomless sodomy during the ZPAW might be a bad idea.
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Post by Batman » Sat Sep 22, 2007 11:31 pm

I have a feeling the lack of daily showering facilities should help.

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Post by sheddi » Sun Sep 23, 2007 4:02 am

Batman wrote:I have a feeling the lack of daily showering facilities should help.
Maybe. Although if I was a betting man I'd wager that at the moment, the countries with the highest birthrates also have the lowest availability of hot water.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_co ... birth_rate
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Post by Lordiego » Sun Sep 23, 2007 7:25 am

Vindex wrote:Only one of the orifices will get 'em preggers y'know
I knew it would eventually get to this...

but I figure it would be cheaper and take up a LOT less space and weight to add contraceptives rather than stock 15 years of Eros Body Glide, and the immense amounts of alcohol it would take to have my woman willingly accept to this.

As somebody mentioned already, sodomy in the PAW without condoms would be a big no-no. Last thing you want is a urethra infection, and having to chop off your johnson in the middle of a deserted wasteland.

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Post by Ben » Sun Sep 23, 2007 7:59 am

If it is a PAW infant mortality would go through the roof. Perhaps the concern wouldn't be how do I keep from getting pregnant but how do I have more so at least 1 will live to be 5 years old.
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Post by Lurch » Sun Sep 23, 2007 8:20 am

Don't forget that it's not just infant mortality but there are a high percentage of women that die in child birth when there isn't medical assistance.

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Post by crypto » Sun Sep 23, 2007 9:14 am

Maybe the apocalypse itself will be your birth control.

There's a real good chance you wont be getting nookie because the charred ashes of the former world swirling on the wind tends to be a turn-off.

IE, she may not be in the mood :D

Cassanova, you should think about stockpiling rubbers, that'd be the simplest thing to do. If getting some nookie is that important to you, and you dont want to do it the old-fashioned way like Onan did, just buy a few hundred rubbers.
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Post by Lady_Helfyre » Sun Sep 23, 2007 10:39 am

Ricky Romero wrote:Good thread idea! I've mentioned it before on here somewhere, but I think if you have the means to aquire it, Depo Provera would be a great addition to a PAW supply stash. It works similarly to oral contraception, and is just as effective, but one injection will prevent pregnancy for 3 months. It also disrupts the normal menstruation cycle, meaning that she'll only have 4 periods a year.

Of course a stash of Depo will only take you so far, but it could get you and your lady-friend through the hardest parts of the PAW, namely the first year. After that, it's rhythm method or bust!
I have to say Depo is not a very effective form of birth control from my stand point. I now have a lovely 4 year old daughter as proof of it's effectiveness.

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Post by BethDeath » Sun Sep 23, 2007 10:43 am

ladyhelfyre wrote: I have to say Depo is not a very effective form of birth control from my stand point. I now have a lovely 4 year old daughter as proof of it's effectiveness.
Yeah I hate that stuff. I got headaches on it and I never lost the weight I gained from being on it.

If guys want nookie in the PAW without having kids then they get snipped. :D

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Post by TetraCyde » Sun Sep 23, 2007 11:18 am

For those of you responding to the "other holes" post, instead of anal sex, what about oral sex? Obviously the women would be out of luck here (even if I was desperate I think the hair, smell, taste, and uncleanliness would still turn me off) but the men could benefit. Regular sex for 3 weeks, oral for 1. That's how it works. And given the fact that her body is so stressed out, what makes you think she will a) be in the mood or b) be loose enough for you to actually do the deed?

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Post by Ben » Sun Sep 23, 2007 11:28 am

crypto wrote:Maybe the apocalypse itself will be your birth control.

There's a real good chance you wont be getting nookie because the charred ashes of the former world swirling on the wind tends to be a turn-off.

IE, she may not be in the mood :D

Cassanova, you should think about stockpiling rubbers, that'd be the simplest thing to do. If getting some nookie is that important to you, and you dont want to do it the old-fashioned way like Onan did, just buy a few hundred rubbers.
You know that didn't work out too good for Onan.

The link was for those that don't know the story.
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Post by BethDeath » Sun Sep 23, 2007 12:45 pm

I see this thread being taken over by oaf patrol...

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Post by Valarius » Sun Sep 23, 2007 1:46 pm

Ben, I looked at that photo a full minute before I realized what the two white round dots on the ground was supposed to represent. Jesus Christ, man. :lol:


Long ago, I made a thread about pregnancy in the PAW. If zombies were to take over the earth, I think that keeping a woman from getting pregnant would only be desirable from a tactical standpoint. Example: My boss in Wal-Mart was two months pregnant when I started working there. She performed small tasks and customer service well enough, but stuff like hanging the signs from the ceilings and putting chickens in the ovens was left to the non-pregnant people. When I left, she was transferred to Alcohol and Tobacco. Less traffic and stress. Now, had the dead actually risen from the earth and started to munch on people, she probably wouldn't have run as fast as I could. She would have been smarter about staying alive, leaving other people to fight. Certainly she started to get more... well, for lack of a better PC term, "bitchy" as the pregnancy continued, but it was mostly talk and orders. She wouldn't have been a pregnant warrior princess, and I wouldn't expect any woman to become one.

As far as getting it on in the PAW, masturbation is the best way to handle those feelings. It's certainly the least satisfying. We may see a rise in same-gender relationships in a long-term PAW, with one person acting as a woman/man.
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Post by jeepinbandtrider » Sun Sep 23, 2007 2:17 pm

Valarius wrote:We may see a rise in same-gender relationships in a long-term PAW, with one person acting as a woman/man.
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Post by Ricky Romero » Sun Sep 23, 2007 2:32 pm

HAHAHAHa :lol: :lol: lolzor :lol: ROFLMAO :lol: HAHAHa!!!!!
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