The Undead EVERYTHING

Topics regarding the study of zombie behavior and physiology. Know your enemy.

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ProZombieHunter
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Post by ProZombieHunter » Sat Jun 26, 2004 5:57 pm

That sort of thing happens to SOBER explosives EXPERTS. A drunk Serbian... Well...

Back when I lived in the Phillipines my aunt was really drunk during the Filipino Independence Day (a day to remember because it's why we're so much like Mexico, only in Asia), and she lit a heavy-duty firecracker.

She had intended to light the explosive and throw it, but she was so drunk that she lit it and threw the lighter.

BOOM! She's down two fingers these days, and doesn't drink as much.
If you drop a zombie, does that count as a kill?

...Think about it.

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Post by NecronomiconExMortis » Sun Jun 27, 2004 1:16 am

What do you do if a blond throws a pin at you?


Run, cause she's got a grenade in her mouth.
"...they woke up on the wrong side... of the grave."
"Shotgun blasted demon peice of lead..."

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ProZombieHunter
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Post by ProZombieHunter » Sun Jun 27, 2004 2:02 am

Nice one.
If you drop a zombie, does that count as a kill?

...Think about it.

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Post by Raccoon City Survivor » Sun Jun 27, 2004 2:30 pm

NecronomiconExMortis wrote:What do you do if a blond throws a pin at you?


Run, cause she's got a grenade in her mouth.
That's great, hahaha, I'll tell that one to my sister (No, she isn't blond, she just likes those jokes).

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ProZombieHunter
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Post by ProZombieHunter » Sun Jun 27, 2004 2:49 pm

If you look carefully, the zombie in my avatar has blonde hair.

What a good place for a grenade. Zombie's mouth, I mean.
If you drop a zombie, does that count as a kill?

...Think about it.

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Post by NecronomiconExMortis » Sun Jun 27, 2004 7:32 pm

I think that's probably the best place for a grenade. As long as said zombie is in close proximity to lots of other zombies and those zombies are standing at a gas station. :D
"...they woke up on the wrong side... of the grave."
"Shotgun blasted demon peice of lead..."

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Post by ProZombieHunter » Mon Jun 28, 2004 9:29 am

Hey, even better. Oh, and, uh, we've already looted the gas station, because the food was all still good, and now we have shitloads of beef jerky and chips and soda and beer. How come they don't sell anything healthy at gas stations?
If you drop a zombie, does that count as a kill?

...Think about it.

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Post by michelle » Mon Jun 28, 2004 10:43 am

ProZombieHunter wrote:How come they don't sell anything healthy at gas stations?
Because people who tend to care about their health don't do their grocery shopping at a gas station. Those who do tend to prefer gross things. So come the PAW, you best be hoping you have or find lots of plant-y things to eat.
a deviant path is the only way
:sk

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Post by ghostface » Mon Jun 28, 2004 11:15 am

Well a gas station can't exactly afford to stock its shelves with fresh fruits, vegetables, cheeses and meats. The likely hood of someone making such a purchase before the item went bad is pretty slim. Hence the junkfood. Plus, with the exception of apples, bananas and the like (which are sold at many gas stations), most healthy food is not usually easy to prepare, carry or eat in a car. A snickers bar on the other hand....
Last edited by ghostface on Mon Jun 28, 2004 12:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.
The tools of conquest do not necessarily come with bombs and explosions and fallout. There are weapons that are simply thoughts, attitudes, prejudices, to be found only in the minds of men. For the record, prejudices can kill and suspicion can destroy, and a thoughtless, frightened search for a scapegoat has a fallout all its own...

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Post by ProZombieHunter » Mon Jun 28, 2004 12:29 pm

Well, at the same time, I'm a dedicated susbscirber of the Jamoni diet, so I was just curious, not really CARING.

::eats whole bag of potato chips, dipping each one into a bucket of metled butter and sipping a cup of gravy::

But yeah. Point(s) taken.
If you drop a zombie, does that count as a kill?

...Think about it.

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Post by NecronomiconExMortis » Tue Jun 29, 2004 12:15 am

They sell granola at gas stations... and I happen to believe that gummy worms are a food group unto themselves.
"...they woke up on the wrong side... of the grave."
"Shotgun blasted demon peice of lead..."

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Post by Horatio_Tyllis » Tue Jun 29, 2004 5:22 am

Q: What do you say when you ex-girlfriend is staggering around in the back yard?


A: Nothing. Reload.

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Post by ProZombieHunter » Wed Jun 30, 2004 2:10 am

Ooo, ouch.

Q) What do you do when MY ex-girlfriend is stumbling around in the back yard?

A) Get a Black and Decker drill and push a rusty bit through both of her kneecaps and then pistol-whip her with the battery pack.

::rimshot!::

Yeah okay, I know, not funny, but hey... She's beggin' for it. Won't leave me alone.
If you drop a zombie, does that count as a kill?

...Think about it.

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Post by HamJob » Wed Jun 30, 2004 2:31 am

Won't leave you alon as in you dumped her and she wants you back or she's just messing with you?
"Eat well your breakfast, brothers, for tonight we dine in hell"

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Post by NecronomiconExMortis » Wed Jun 30, 2004 3:56 am

Who cares! That sounds like a good idea. Do that to my ex too, while you're at it.
"...they woke up on the wrong side... of the grave."
"Shotgun blasted demon peice of lead..."

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Post by Horatio_Tyllis » Wed Jun 30, 2004 5:29 am

Ex-girlfriend...

Zombie...

Ex-girlfriend...

Zombie...

Ex-girlfriend...

Zombie...

A plan seems to be coming together in my mind...



Q: What do you say when you see your Ex-Girlfriend shambling in the backyard?

A: "Click" shit, i'm out... Hey Raptor, wanna get this one for me?

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Post by the lone swordsmen » Wed Jun 30, 2004 11:35 am

Q: What do you say when you see your Ex-Girlfriend shambling in the backyard?
A: time to hide the vodka
i live by the way of the sword


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Post by ProZombieHunter » Wed Jun 30, 2004 12:59 pm

Q) Why is PZH's ex-girlfriend in his back yard?

A) Because she can't resist me, despite the fact that I have tried my damndest to get her to leave me alone. Seriously. (I started by breaking up with her. Didn't work. So I told her off. Didn't work. Then I got pretty mad and started yelling at her one day until she started crying and then I told her to stay away from me. She still calls, occasionally).

I guess women have trouble avoiding the ol' heat-seekin' missle of love.
If you drop a zombie, does that count as a kill?

...Think about it.

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Post by the lone swordsmen » Wed Jun 30, 2004 1:53 pm

ok where getting off track
but i think if the virus where spread threw mosquitos that could mean world wide infection since the mosquito has adapted to life on all seven continents
i live by the way of the sword


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Post by ProZombieHunter » Wed Jun 30, 2004 3:22 pm

Dude -- Bug spray.
If you drop a zombie, does that count as a kill?

...Think about it.

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Horatio_Tyllis
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Post by Horatio_Tyllis » Wed Jun 30, 2004 6:18 pm

PZH, that's what you call a stalker. Seriously, do some research online, and you will see how to deal with her. Or alternately, if you use MSN, add my contact, and we can discuss it, i've had to study the topic in my criminal psych classes.







And oh yeah, to keep things on topic.... Zombies

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Post by HamJob » Wed Jun 30, 2004 6:39 pm

Dude, I know a guy like that. Not stalking me, but he stalks my girlfriend. He's one of those uber-christians that always tries to convert people.
He's always telling my girlfriend that he's gonna convert her to a christian, and that they're gonna get married and have lotsa kids, then she makes fun of him, then I kick his ass.
"Eat well your breakfast, brothers, for tonight we dine in hell"

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Post by Raccoon City Survivor » Wed Jun 30, 2004 9:27 pm

the lone swordsmen wrote:ok where getting off track
but i think if the virus where spread threw mosquitos that could mean world wide infection since the mosquito has adapted to life on all seven continents
That won't work, 'cause skeeters aren't attracted to zombies.

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Post by Raccoon City Survivor » Wed Jun 30, 2004 9:52 pm

HamJob wrote:He's one of those uber-christians that always tries to convert people.
That can be easily fixed with a shotgun to his head :twisted: .

Damn cults.

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