HOPELESS

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HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Sun Nov 17, 2013 2:37 pm

Greetings,
I have finally declared it "hopeless" to get any family interest in preparedness. At best, they appreciated the emergency lights I bought, since we just had a 14 hour power outage. Absolutely no interest in anything else. Guess I'm on my own if TSHTF; or possibly be in great demand for emergency level, high speed training. :(

This is making it difficult for me to maintain MY enthusiasm. :?

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by TacAir » Sun Nov 17, 2013 2:58 pm

Take a deep breath.

Saying "interest in preparedness" is pretty broad.

May I suggest...

A good way to save money to to buy in bulk. Knowing how to store the 'extra' bulk is a big deal, but you can help on that. So - saving money is good.

Camping is a fun, family activity. Can't help but learn a few things while out camping.

I just bought some MRE's for the grand-kids as 'stocking stuffers' - start 'em early, eh?

Sometimes, calling preparedness a different, "fun", name will help. I would say keep at helping them, but don't become one of 'those guys' - either they will get it or they won't.

You aren't alone in this, just don't give up on yourself....
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Re: HOPELESS

Post by maldon007 » Sun Nov 17, 2013 4:50 pm

Set small goals, reasonable for one person, that don't raise too many eyebrows. Results convert non believers, so maybe focus on specifics that are highly likely first (a good idea anyway, imo) ...Easy stuff like, extra of things you occasionally run out of. People might not consider it "prepping" that you have a few extra cases of paper towels somewhere... But when you run out one day, and really need some for a party or something. You, the hero, grabs some from your stash, saving the day. Do this a few times & it breaks the ice... Move up slowly to items/skills/gear for less likely scenarios.

That's how I try to do it in my similar situation.
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Re: HOPELESS

Post by gundogs » Sun Nov 17, 2013 4:54 pm

I know exactly how you feel. I just keep plugging along with my preps knowing they will be needed at some point.
Besides, I now think it's better that others don't know too much

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by JayceSlayn » Sun Nov 17, 2013 5:08 pm

Starting small is a good way to go, like maldon said. Having excess of normal supplies around could be considered more "convenience" than "prepping". My SO isn't quite into being prepared as much as I am, but she appreciates having extra TP/paper towels/dish soap/food/etc. around when we need them, and that we are always prepared to go on hikes at a moment's notice, and so forth. She is at least supportive, if somewhat disinterested at times. :)

I have a lot of extra food in the pantry and storage closet, and if you think "I'm craving making X thing for dinner tonight...do we have all the ingredients?", it's nice that usually the answer is "Yes". While there are a lot of things you don't have the opportunity or need to use very often, but we like to keep stocked (like water filters, the more serious equipment of a first aid kit...), I think most people are reasonable enough to see the need for them in the "just in case" scenarios.

It can be hard to convince some people, because most of us will go our entire lives with few interruptions of modern conveniences, so the precedent isn't very strong, but apparently some of us have the imagination enough to think what would it be like if not. I think of the object of being prepared as "risk management" or "insurance" as well: we don't plan to get in car wrecks or having the house burn down, but there is always a small possibility of these things happening, so we buy car insurance, wear out seatbelt, and put smoke detectors and fire extinguishers in our house. In the off chance that something happens, a penny of pre-planning is worth a pound of ex post facto "fire fighting".

We have complained on the board before about the Hollywood dramatization of such shows as After Armageddon and American Blackout, but I've found those sorts of shows are exactly designed to be engaging enough for people who aren't already in the being prepared mindset. Seeing a made-for-TV accounting of how a potential disaster scenario might play out is a lot more entertaining than reading a .gov report on the subject. And the shows seem to help introduce the idea that most people probably aren't prepared as much as they would have liked to be if such an event were to occur. Could still be difficult if you make it a little obvious that you would like to watch one of these shows with your family, but they might listen to the TV better than you, at least to start. :P
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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Rednex » Sun Nov 17, 2013 5:57 pm

maldon007 wrote:Set small goals, reasonable for one person, that don't raise too many eyebrows. Results convert non believers, so maybe focus on specifics that are highly likely first (a good idea anyway, imo) ...Easy stuff like, extra of things you occasionally run out of. People might not consider it "prepping" that you have a few extra cases of paper towels somewhere... But when you run out one day, and really need some for a party or something. You, the hero, grabs some from your stash, saving the day. Do this a few times & it breaks the ice... Move up slowly to items/skills/gear for less likely scenarios.

That's how I try to do it in my similar situation.

I do that especially with toilet paper.Seems every other week my sister calls me to ask if i have extra toilet paper they ran out again. She buys a 4 roll pack and expects it to last forever. Yes i saved there day but they do not learn in her case.
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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Gaelin » Wed Nov 20, 2013 11:16 am

How did you introduce the idea of prepping? If you start out prepping for zombies/nukes/plague etc it might be a little off putting, If you introduce it (like others suggested) as stocking up, or keeping a little extra on hand it seems less strange and more acceptable.

It took me almost 2 years to get my ex wife (before the divorce) to start a stockpile. I did it by showing her how, if we bought items on sale and in bulk, we could save a lot of money and not need to go grocery shopping two or three times a week.

I recently convinced my parents the same way. they now have a modest but solid 2 months worth of food in house and its growing. I showed them how a loss of income (my dad works, my mom is disabled) could be catastrophic and that having a back stock could give them a bit of an advantage if dad were to lose his job/get sick etc.

It could all be in how you broach the subject. Whatever you do don't give up. If you have to, go it alone and go slow. You (hopefully) may never need to use your supplies. But if worse comes to worse you and your family will be better off with what you've done than they would otherwise.
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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Wed Nov 20, 2013 11:35 am

TacAir wrote:Take a deep breath.

Saying "interest in preparedness" is pretty broad.

May I suggest...

A good way to save money to to buy in bulk. Knowing how to store the 'extra' bulk is a big deal, but you can help on that. So - saving money is good.

Camping is a fun, family activity. Can't help but learn a few things while out camping.

I just bought some MRE's for the grand-kids as 'stocking stuffers' - start 'em early, eh?

Sometimes, calling preparedness a different, "fun", name will help. I would say keep at helping them, but don't become one of 'those guys' - either they will get it or they won't.

You aren't alone in this, just don't give up on yourself....

I don't have a problem buying in bulk, as I am now retired & on a fixed income, that idea is accepted.
Nothing beyond that, however. No willingness to consider any possibility of serious, long term problems.
No willingness to camp, or anything remotely like preparing for self/home defense.
Thanks for the reply.

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Gaelin » Wed Nov 20, 2013 12:34 pm

MM, what part of the country are you from?
dani monster wrote:

"Mom you do know that zombies aren't real, right?"
"...You get Santa and the Easter Bunny. I get zombies. Eat your damned trail mix."

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by ZombieGranny » Wed Nov 20, 2013 12:47 pm

What results do you want from them?
(If they accept it as your hobby, then you are one step closer than some on here.)
-
I would suggest getting in touch with your local chapter and attending a meeting.
If you get to know the folks in your area and go camping with them, it will keep your enthusiasm up.
In my day, we didn't have virtual reality.
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Preps buy us time. Time to learn how and time to remember how. Time to figure out what is a want, what is a need.

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mikeyboy » Wed Nov 20, 2013 1:47 pm

Mad Mike wrote:Greetings,
I have finally declared it "hopeless" to get any family interest in preparedness. At best, they appreciated the emergency lights I bought, since we just had a 14 hour power outage. Absolutely no interest in anything else. Guess I'm on my own if TSHTF; or possibly be in great demand for emergency level, high speed training. :(

This is making it difficult for me to maintain MY enthusiasm. :?
What do you mean by "Preparedness" ? Do you want you everyone in your family to wear 5.11 cargo pants , go shopping for survival gear with you, or watch the news constantly and worry about ever possible bad scenario that can happen? What exactly do you want or expect?

Here is a question for you about preparedness, do you have life insurance and homeowners/renters insurance? If you don't have it you are not prepared. If you have insurance and you are the one who took the intuitive to buy it for the family then good for you. However if your wife got the insurance because you find that stuff "boring", you are being a hypocrite.

You see my family is not real interested prepping either, and they are also not that interested in how I fix the toilet when it stops working right. However when the time comes, whether its a broken toilet or a SHTF event, I will have the equipment and skills to take care of it. DIY and prepping are hobbies of mine, its not a lifestyle to me. If my wife or kids find interest in it great, but for the most part they don't really care. I like it better that way, I don't want my family to all act like they should be on and episode of "Doomsday Preppers" just like I don't want a house full of people wearing tool belts and acting like Bob Villa. If something happens to me my wife and kids know where my tools are and where my preps are. They can get by on the basics that they reluctantly learned from me and on common sense.

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Redacted » Sat Nov 23, 2013 9:22 pm

Mikeyboy wrote:What do you mean by "Preparedness" ? Do you want you everyone in your family to wear 5.11 cargo pants , go shopping for survival gear with you, or watch the news constantly and worry about ever possible bad scenario that can happen? What exactly do you want or expect?

Here is a question for you about preparedness, do you have life insurance and homeowners/renters insurance? If you don't have it you are not prepared. If you have insurance and you are the one who took the intuitive to buy it for the family then good for you. However if your wife got the insurance because you find that stuff "boring", you are being a hypocrite.

You see my family is not real interested prepping either, and they are also not that interested in how I fix the toilet when it stops working right. However when the time comes, whether its a broken toilet or a SHTF event, I will have the equipment and skills to take care of it. DIY and prepping are hobbies of mine, its not a lifestyle to me. If my wife or kids find interest in it great, but for the most part they don't really care. I like it better that way, I don't want my family to all act like they should be on and episode of "Doomsday Preppers" just like I don't want a house full of people wearing tool belts and acting like Bob Villa. If something happens to me my wife and kids know where my tools are and where my preps are. They can get by on the basics that they reluctantly learned from me and on common sense.
QFT.

My .02 is this, I don't wear a seatbelt because I like to. I do it because it's necessary. I don't carry a concealed pistol because I like to. I do it because it's necessary. I don't prepare for en emergency because spending thousands of dollars on a bug out bag and a stash of gear I will almost certainly never use is fun. I do it because the *one* time, that having it or not having it will result in my ability to keep on going or not keep on going, all of the money I have set aside for other things will be for naught.

If other people, even my closest family, are not interested then that becomes their prerogative but isn't going to alter my trajectory.
Are we not drawn onward, we few, drawn onward to new era?

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:22 pm

maldon007 wrote:Set small goals, reasonable for one person, that don't raise too many eyebrows. Results convert non believers, so maybe focus on specifics that are highly likely first (a good idea anyway, imo) ...Easy stuff like, extra of things you occasionally run out of. People might not consider it "prepping" that you have a few extra cases of paper towels somewhere... But when you run out one day, and really need some for a party or something. You, the hero, grabs some from your stash, saving the day. Do this a few times & it breaks the ice... Move up slowly to items/skills/gear for less likely scenarios.

That's how I try to do it in my similar situation.


I try to have extras, but it's virtually impossible to get someone to replace the empty roll of toilet paper! I have already purchased gear for "aw shit" situations but there is no interest in practicing. I guess they expect me to be around forever & too take care of any & all problems.

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:26 pm

gundogs wrote:I know exactly how you feel. I just keep plugging along with my preps knowing they will be needed at some point.
Besides, I now think it's better that others don't know too much

I keep a low profile - only my wife & adult kids have any idea at all of what I have stashed away. Even my grand daughter is in the dark, as she talks too much & I don't need her advertising.

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:30 pm

JayceSlayn wrote:Starting small is a good way to go, like maldon said. Having excess of normal supplies around could be considered more "convenience" than "prepping". My SO isn't quite into being prepared as much as I am, but she appreciates having extra TP/paper towels/dish soap/food/etc. around when we need them, and that we are always prepared to go on hikes at a moment's notice, and so forth. She is at least supportive, if somewhat disinterested at times. :)

I have a lot of extra food in the pantry and storage closet, and if you think "I'm craving making X thing for dinner tonight...do we have all the ingredients?", it's nice that usually the answer is "Yes". While there are a lot of things you don't have the opportunity or need to use very often, but we like to keep stocked (like water filters, the more serious equipment of a first aid kit...), I think most people are reasonable enough to see the need for them in the "just in case" scenarios.

It can be hard to convince some people, because most of us will go our entire lives with few interruptions of modern conveniences, so the precedent isn't very strong, but apparently some of us have the imagination enough to think what would it be like if not. I think of the object of being prepared as "risk management" or "insurance" as well: we don't plan to get in car wrecks or having the house burn down, but there is always a small possibility of these things happening, so we buy car insurance, wear out seatbelt, and put smoke detectors and fire extinguishers in our house. In the off chance that something happens, a penny of pre-planning is worth a pound of ex post facto "fire fighting".

We have complained on the board before about the Hollywood dramatization of such shows as After Armageddon and American Blackout, but I've found those sorts of shows are exactly designed to be engaging enough for people who aren't already in the being prepared mindset. Seeing a made-for-TV accounting of how a potential disaster scenario might play out is a lot more entertaining than reading a .gov report on the subject. And the shows seem to help introduce the idea that most people probably aren't prepared as much as they would have liked to be if such an event were to occur. Could still be difficult if you make it a little obvious that you would like to watch one of these shows with your family, but they might listen to the TV better than you, at least to start. :P

The wife & I have watched most of those types of show & she says "HMMM" but it dies the next day. The kids won't watch them because they are "too depressing"

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by KnightoftheRoc » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:31 pm

Mad Mike wrote:I try to have extras, but it's virtually impossible to get someone to replace the empty roll of toilet paper! I have already purchased gear for "aw shit" situations but there is no interest in practicing. I guess they expect me to be around forever & too take care of any & all problems.
Shut down the water, electric, and gas, then disappear for a week, on your own. I bet they figure something out before you get back. :lol:
I have the same issue at my house- why should anyone else handle it, if I'm there to do it (and they can be sure that I will). In a way, it's pretty much a problem we create for ourselves, and one that needs to be addressed the same as we do all our other preparedness issues.
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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:34 pm

Rednex wrote:
maldon007 wrote:Set small goals, reasonable for one person, that don't raise too many eyebrows. Results convert non believers, so maybe focus on specifics that are highly likely first (a good idea anyway, imo) ...Easy stuff like, extra of things you occasionally run out of. People might not consider it "prepping" that you have a few extra cases of paper towels somewhere... But when you run out one day, and really need some for a party or something. You, the hero, grabs some from your stash, saving the day. Do this a few times & it breaks the ice... Move up slowly to items/skills/gear for less likely scenarios.

That's how I try to do it in my similar situation.

I do that especially with toilet paper.Seems every other week my sister calls me to ask if i have extra toilet paper they ran out again. She buys a 4 roll pack and expects it to last forever. Yes i saved there day but they do not learn in her case.

Perhaps you should be "out" too, maybe that would let the message soak in when they have to use a Sears Catalog...... :clap:
What's that old saying about leading a horse to water?

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:40 pm

Gaelin wrote:How did you introduce the idea of prepping? If you start out prepping for zombies/nukes/plague etc it might be a little off putting, If you introduce it (like others suggested) as stocking up, or keeping a little extra on hand it seems less strange and more acceptable.

It took me almost 2 years to get my ex wife (before the divorce) to start a stockpile. I did it by showing her how, if we bought items on sale and in bulk, we could save a lot of money and not need to go grocery shopping two or three times a week.

I recently convinced my parents the same way. they now have a modest but solid 2 months worth of food in house and its growing. I showed them how a loss of income (my dad works, my mom is disabled) could be catastrophic and that having a back stock could give them a bit of an advantage if dad were to lose his job/get sick etc.

It could all be in how you broach the subject. Whatever you do don't give up. If you have to, go it alone and go slow. You (hopefully) may never need to use your supplies. But if worse comes to worse you and your family will be better off with what you've done than they would otherwise.

No, I started with preparing for a power outage that lasted more than a few hours. Then when events like Hurricane Katrina happened I asked "what if that happened here?" I am alone & going slow - finances dictate that. I just hope that IF any bad stuff happens there will be time to do some "refresher" training.

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:41 pm

Gaelin wrote:MM, what part of the country are you from?

Western PA, near the Ohio border.

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:47 pm

ZombieGranny wrote:What results do you want from them?
(If they accept it as your hobby, then you are one step closer than some on here.)
-
I would suggest getting in touch with your local chapter and attending a meeting.
If you get to know the folks in your area and go camping with them, it will keep your enthusiasm up.

Everyone is OK with my hobby, so there is that.

I would like them to do a little shooting. They have all hunted before, but it has been a few years. I would also like it if they would learn skills such as first aid & cold weather survival. Winters are not very pleasant here. Mostly, just get mentally prepared that bad stuff COULD happen & we would be on our own for some period of time.

I have a snowballs chance of getting the family to go camping.

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:51 pm

Mikeyboy wrote:
Mad Mike wrote:Greetings,
I have finally declared it "hopeless" to get any family interest in preparedness. At best, they appreciated the emergency lights I bought, since we just had a 14 hour power outage. Absolutely no interest in anything else. Guess I'm on my own if TSHTF; or possibly be in great demand for emergency level, high speed training. :(

This is making it difficult for me to maintain MY enthusiasm. :?
What do you mean by "Preparedness" ? Do you want you everyone in your family to wear 5.11 cargo pants , go shopping for survival gear with you, or watch the news constantly and worry about ever possible bad scenario that can happen? What exactly do you want or expect?

Here is a question for you about preparedness, do you have life insurance and homeowners/renters insurance? If you don't have it you are not prepared. If you have insurance and you are the one who took the intuitive to buy it for the family then good for you. However if your wife got the insurance because you find that stuff "boring", you are being a hypocrite.

You see my family is not real interested prepping either, and they are also not that interested in how I fix the toilet when it stops working right. However when the time comes, whether its a broken toilet or a SHTF event, I will have the equipment and skills to take care of it. DIY and prepping are hobbies of mine, its not a lifestyle to me. If my wife or kids find interest in it great, but for the most part they don't really care. I like it better that way, I don't want my family to all act like they should be on and episode of "Doomsday Preppers" just like I don't want a house full of people wearing tool belts and acting like Bob Villa. If something happens to me my wife and kids know where my tools are and where my preps are. They can get by on the basics that they reluctantly learned from me and on common sense.

Nope, that isn't my goal. I answered that in Granny's post. A little more self sufficeny would go a long way.

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:54 pm

Redacted wrote:
Mikeyboy wrote:What do you mean by "Preparedness" ? Do you want you everyone in your family to wear 5.11 cargo pants , go shopping for survival gear with you, or watch the news constantly and worry about ever possible bad scenario that can happen? What exactly do you want or expect?

Here is a question for you about preparedness, do you have life insurance and homeowners/renters insurance? If you don't have it you are not prepared. If you have insurance and you are the one who took the intuitive to buy it for the family then good for you. However if your wife got the insurance because you find that stuff "boring", you are being a hypocrite.

You see my family is not real interested prepping either, and they are also not that interested in how I fix the toilet when it stops working right. However when the time comes, whether its a broken toilet or a SHTF event, I will have the equipment and skills to take care of it. DIY and prepping are hobbies of mine, its not a lifestyle to me. If my wife or kids find interest in it great, but for the most part they don't really care. I like it better that way, I don't want my family to all act like they should be on and episode of "Doomsday Preppers" just like I don't want a house full of people wearing tool belts and acting like Bob Villa. If something happens to me my wife and kids know where my tools are and where my preps are. They can get by on the basics that they reluctantly learned from me and on common sense.
QFT.

My .02 is this, I don't wear a seatbelt because I like to. I do it because it's necessary. I don't carry a concealed pistol because I like to. I do it because it's necessary. I don't prepare for en emergency because spending thousands of dollars on a bug out bag and a stash of gear I will almost certainly never use is fun. I do it because the *one* time, that having it or not having it will result in my ability to keep on going or not keep on going, all of the money I have set aside for other things will be for naught.

If other people, even my closest family, are not interested then that becomes their prerogative but isn't going to alter my trajectory.

It may not alter my trajectory, but it will affect me. I can only spread myself so thin.

What does QFT mean?

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Re: HOPELESS

Post by Mad Mike » Sun Nov 24, 2013 8:57 pm

KnightoftheRoc wrote:
Mad Mike wrote:I try to have extras, but it's virtually impossible to get someone to replace the empty roll of toilet paper! I have already purchased gear for "aw shit" situations but there is no interest in practicing. I guess they expect me to be around forever & too take care of any & all problems.
Shut down the water, electric, and gas, then disappear for a week, on your own. I bet they figure something out before you get back. :lol:
I have the same issue at my house- why should anyone else handle it, if I'm there to do it (and they can be sure that I will). In a way, it's pretty much a problem we create for ourselves, and one that needs to be addressed the same as we do all our other preparedness issues.


Yeah, they'll call a repairman & I'll be stuck with the bills when I return. I'm still trying to figure out how to fix this.

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Location: PNW

Re: HOPELESS

Post by ZombieGranny » Sun Nov 24, 2013 11:13 pm

QTF = quoted for truth
In my day, we didn't have virtual reality.
If a one-eyed razorback barbarian warrior was chasing you with an ax, you just had to hope you could outrun him.
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Preps buy us time. Time to learn how and time to remember how. Time to figure out what is a want, what is a need.

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