College kids

A place to discuss special considerations involved prepping and reacting to a disaster with children, pets and other family concerns.

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lailr
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College kids

Post by lailr » Fri Nov 22, 2019 12:58 pm

So I've made the leap to empty nester, with kids now in a metropolitan area 4 hours away. One has a car, and the other is at a campus 30 minutes away, and a freshman with no car. If the worst day happens, has anyone else thought through useful advice for kids either returning home, and/or retrieving them? Honestly, this has caught me flatfooted amongst the hustle of college essays, scholarships, and move in's. Like -if I have to go get them, and communications are down, they know to leave directions of where they are going.

But are there anymore tips folks have thought through for their grown kids?
Last edited by lailr on Fri Nov 22, 2019 3:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: College kids

Post by raptor » Fri Nov 22, 2019 2:55 pm

Set up a communication plan with multiple contact points.
Social media could be useful in this instance as well as text, voice and email.

The actual event obviously should dictate a response but I would certainly suggest agreeing upon Plan A meeting point and a Plan B meeting point in the event of the loss of communications. The meeting point(s) should preferable be along the route to or from home/university.

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Re: College kids

Post by Asymetryczna » Fri Nov 22, 2019 5:46 pm

Everything Raptor wrote.

Assuming that you've taught them about the big, bad world, keeping their head on a swivel, keeping a letter opener nearby and all that, my first thought is that you shouldn't worry. But, as a parent, of course you do... (also, for daughters, don't accept open drinks, that any male can act like a pig, etc...). I've been in the same situation and on the opposite end. Mine went/are out of state a bit further away. Plus, I travel great distances some.

First, let me say that I taught at a university within your 4-hour radius. If you take alcohol out of the equation, I'd say that it is one of the safest places possible to live and this with the fact that as soon as the sun went down, Friday night ride-a-longs' with LEO friends demonstrated how many of the crack and meth heads came alive and liked to operate around the metro area. I can speak for campus security for 3 campuses within your radius that I found extremely squared away. I checked in detail where my kids attend/attended as well and what I found really impressed me.

In terms of extreme events, I lived through the worse ice storm I've ever experienced while I was a prof there. It came fast and shut off power for the entire city for 5 and in some areas 10 days. The university has its own power plant. Power never went off. No utilities of any kind went out on campus.

Texting was not a big thing then; however, now, any kind of campus alert can reach the entire student body in about a flash. Student are quick to point out hazards and the word spreads. Often this causes problems as well. ROTC spotted carrying drill rifles have caused lockdowns for hours...
Perhaps, make friends with people on their campuses. A prof, campus policeman, etc. Ask if you can buy them a coffee. Get their business card and you have another point of contact when you can't make contact with your own. I always had parents call me and I made certain to always reassure them that all was well. If all comms are down, the two groups I mention will likely be the first to have them back up. And so, what I am telling you mainly is that the campus is one of the safest places they can be, and as the most important asset to the university business model they should try to remain within its protection.

There are exceptions. A former Marine with a brain tumor took up space on top of bldg at a Texas University once. Another nut job committed unspeakable acts in a classroom at Va Tech. And there others. These are sick people with no value of life. Exceptions.

The bigger danger is a spoiled, statistically white male in a Greek fraternity. (One of my children joined the Greek system but I provided no financial support for that). Last 2 weeks for example: https://www.cnn.com/2019/11/13/us/frate ... index.html

In terms of total breakdown of society, I still recommend that they stay put on campus until they feel they can no longer do so. Go to them. Make a list of those points between your castle and theirs where they are safe should they have to move. They can develop their own link up spots - mine are all family or families of men I have served with. Each of these are another point of contact for safety and/or leaving messages.

Hope you find this reassuring. Glad if I can help.
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Re: College kids

Post by RoneKiln » Sun Nov 24, 2019 4:37 pm

I can't really speak from a parent's perspective. When I first moved several hours away from my parents with two major cities between us, I very clearly told them not to come after me if the worst happened. Due to my youth, I was by far the stronger, faster, more durable, and far more dangerous of my family. I told them to focus on helping those we cared about that were nearby, and I'd show up if I could.

I also told them I may choose to stay put and help those I cared about in my new home instead of risking crossing two major cities to get to them.

My Mom had trouble with that concept, but my Dad seemed to accept it.
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Re: College kids

Post by lailr » Mon Nov 25, 2019 3:29 pm

Asymetryczna wrote:
Fri Nov 22, 2019 5:46 pm
Everything Raptor wrote.

Assuming that you've taught them about the big, bad world, keeping their head on a swivel, keeping a letter opener nearby and all that, my first thought is that you shouldn't worry. But, as a parent, of course you do... (also, for daughters, don't accept open drinks, that any male can act like a pig, etc...). I've been in the same situation and on the opposite end. Mine went/are out of state a bit further away. Plus, I travel great distances some.

First, let me say that I taught at a university within your 4-hour radius. If you take alcohol out of the equation, I'd say that it is one of the safest places possible to live and this with the fact that as soon as the sun went down, Friday night ride-a-longs' with LEO friends demonstrated how many of the crack and meth heads came alive and liked to operate around the metro area. I can speak for campus security for 3 campuses within your radius that I found extremely squared away. I checked in detail where my kids attend/attended as well and what I found really impressed me.

In terms of extreme events, I lived through the worse ice storm I've ever experienced while I was a prof there. It came fast and shut off power for the entire city for 5 and in some areas 10 days. The university has its own power plant. Power never went off. No utilities of any kind went out on campus.

Texting was not a big thing then; however, now, any kind of campus alert can reach the entire student body in about a flash. Student are quick to point out hazards and the word spreads. Often this causes problems as well. ROTC spotted carrying drill rifles have caused lockdowns for hours...
Perhaps, make friends with people on their campuses. A prof, campus policeman, etc. Ask if you can buy them a coffee. Get their business card and you have another point of contact when you can't make contact with your own. I always had parents call me and I made certain to always reassure them that all was well. If all comms are down, the two groups I mention will likely be the first to have them back up. And so, what I am telling you mainly is that the campus is one of the safest places they can be, and as the most important asset to the university business model they should try to remain within its protection.

There are exceptions. A former Marine with a brain tumor took up space on top of bldg at a Texas University once. Another nut job committed unspeakable acts in a classroom at Va Tech. And there others. These are sick people with no value of life. Exceptions.

The bigger danger is a spoiled, statistically white male in a Greek fraternity. (One of my children joined the Greek system but I provided no financial support for that). Last 2 weeks for example: https://www.cnn.com/2019/11/13/us/frate ... index.html

In terms of total breakdown of society, I still recommend that they stay put on campus until they feel they can no longer do so. Go to them. Make a list of those points between your castle and theirs where they are safe should they have to move. They can develop their own link up spots - mine are all family or families of men I have served with. Each of these are another point of contact for safety and/or leaving messages.

Hope you find this reassuring. Glad if I can help.

That's awesome! Thanks! One's at NCSTATE Majoring in Aerospace Engineering, and the little one is at UNC Chapel Hill, planning on attending med school after. I've spoken with both campus' police trying to make connections, as I'm LEO myself.

And I've tried to teach them about the big bad world, and as one's a girl, I've had boy's are trash talks too.

Still worry though

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Re: College kids

Post by egghunter » Tue Dec 03, 2019 5:00 am

In case we are out if something happens..we will try our best to really go to our meet up spot. We did set a time for that. Let's say something happens at 1:00pm then we have until 6:00pm to reach our spot.

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Re: College kids

Post by Dabster » Tue Dec 03, 2019 7:26 pm

Would it be possible to give them a cheap HAM radio and maybe a bit of practice, maybe even a HAM license?

I've tried to keep my kids nerdy, I might be able to talk them into something like this.
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Re: College kids

Post by lailr » Thu Dec 05, 2019 4:46 pm

Dabster wrote:
Tue Dec 03, 2019 7:26 pm
Would it be possible to give them a cheap HAM radio and maybe a bit of practice, maybe even a HAM license?

I've tried to keep my kids nerdy, I might be able to talk them into something like this.
That's a good idea, and the engineer would probably go for it

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Re: College kids

Post by Evan the Diplomat » Thu Dec 05, 2019 5:38 pm

A lot of good advice has already been given. I will add a little more which I hope will be just as valuable. Make sure the carless child has a bicycle.

If they have room for it in their apartments or dormitories, the basic camping gear of hiking boots tent or tarp sleeping bag and suitable clothing.

I would work out a plan for the two of them to get together in a difficult situation. It will be easier for you to recover the two of them from one spot then going from point A to point B then point C.
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Re: College kids

Post by MPMalloy » Fri Dec 06, 2019 12:24 pm

Bike. Yes, a bike. Excellent idea!

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