Um, is Mrs. Laager ALWAYS accusing you of being up to no good? Sheeeesh, sounds like she needs to drink some more coffee!
As a general rule, I do believe she does....perhaps not always up to no good, but more of a I am usually involved in something....any more coffee and I'd probably never get out of "the room"..........then again after 30 years of putting up with me, I feel that perhaps she knows me very well.
For instance, she was attending college courses at the local college, her classes were in the afternoon from one till around three. My usual day went something like this, drop her off, head over to the local gun store, bother the clerks and look to see what kind of odd stuff might have made its way onto the shelf, then head over to the college, find a place to park do a little reading and relaxing. While waiting for her to finish class.
So one day we left our house for lunch and we took one of the major roads, a north-south four lane road. In the inside south bound lane was a really large rock, it sat there all day until we came by again at just around 3.30pm. Now on this day I had to drive by that large rock about six times. Now this rock was sitting about 150 feet from a four way intersection with four way stop signs.
No one else would pick it up, so when I left to go pick her up from school (I went back home) I took one of my moving dollies with me. On the way back I pulled over into a church parking lot and waited for a break in traffic, took the dolly over and scooped up the rock. Just as I was tilting the dolly back I noticed a white Chevy Luv pickup truck heading south on the inside lane (left side near the median). Plenty of time for me to make it to the parking lot, since he was on the far side of the four way stop.
I'm thinking great timing and hustle my way towards the church parking lot. All of a sudden I hear a horn start blaring and I look up expecting to get run over by someone in the right hand lane (south bound traffic). Oh no.....no one there, its the old bastard in the Chevy Luv truck going at his horn like Joshua's army at the Battle of Jericho.
So I wave at him and continue on my way towards the parking lot. I dump the rock and start back to my van (with Lil sitting inside), when I hear the horn start up again (I'm guessing the walls are not totally down yet) and then I hear the old bastard yelling at me for dumping trash in the church parking lot. I shake my head and put the darn rock back on the dolly and push it over to the van and then pull the darn dolly up into the back of the van. Climb out, close the tailgate door and then jump in and start off down the road.
Lil just looks over at me and says, so what are you going to do with your new rock?
Me: Well I'll see if Mother wants it house, she likes large rocks for some reason, if not then we can take it out to the property and leave it out there.
Next thing I know there's a city LEO pulling me over.....followed by a white Chevy Luv truck, who also pulled over behind the LEO's vehicle. Guess he wanted to see the show or something.
LEO: Oh its you.......
Me: Afternoon officer.
LEO: So want to tell me what's going on? I hear you're were dumping trash in the church parking lot.
So I tell him what happened, get out show him the rock and he says, yea we've had some calls about that, but the city would not send anyone out to move it.
We talk a bit and then he walks back to the Chevy Luv and talks to the old bastard in the truck, then he gets in his cruiser and heads off........I smile, then flip the old bastard in the Chevy Luv truck off and get back in my van and head off towards my parent's house.
As we are driving down the road Lil looks over and says:
Lil: You know only you could somehow manage to get pulled over by the cops for picking up a rock from the middle of the road.....as she starts laughing.
Me: No Baby, it's only you can prevent Forrest Fires, Iron Eyes Cody was the one upset about litter bugs.....besides you know what I like to say no good deed goes unpunished............
Lil: Let it go..........just let it go.....
Junior thought it was funny as well.
“Complacency kills. Paranoia is the reason I’m still alive.” If we do happen to make contact, I expect nothing less than gratuitous violence from the lot of ya.