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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2011 8:43 pm 
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Location: Alabama-Land of low taxes, lots of guns and more meth labs than you can count!
Is that Paul McCartney or has he turned into a Zombie? It's hard to tell from 10 feet away!

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The optimist learns English, a pessimist - Chinese, realist exploring a Kalashnikov rifle.-russian survival website
1911nufsaid wrote:
I'm not implying you, or anyone on the forum for that matter, is a 'end of world' nut job.

Woods Walker wrote:
If their shit was any tighter the carbon within would be turned to diamonds.

Put me down for AK, XD45 and Pie


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2011 9:18 pm 
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Flying Lead wrote:
Is that Paul McCartney or has he turned into a Zombie? It's hard to tell from 10 feet away!


Ouch! We'd probably have to open up Keith Richards to figure it out with him.

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squinty wrote:
Birds gotta fly, fish gotta swim, zombies gotta shuffle around and eatcher brains. Why do sharks eat divers? Why not swim around and starve to death?
Why do tornadoes zero in on trailer parks? Why not just blow around harmlessly? It's the way of the world, man.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2011 11:52 am 
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Location: Outside K.C. Mo.
"Got any TP I can trade for?"

"No, but I do have some thing just as good, several hundred dollars worth of small bills."

"Cool, water proof TP."

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Those who ignore history are doomed to repeat it, & you can bet they'll whine that nobody warned them.


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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2011 3:05 pm 
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"It's funny how playing Resident Evil didn't help me prepare at all..."

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I HAVE BOWELS FULL OF S**T, EAT THEM! EAT THEM!!!!!!!!!!


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 04, 2012 4:21 pm 
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"Range me"

"How about that! An AR is actually better than an AK!"

"Crap. All my MREs expired last month."

".222! I told you .223!... No they're not close...Yeah they fit...But you see the bolt won't actually...nevermind"

"Who knew you could make beer from grass, motor oil, and dirt."

"Oh look. A butterfly..." (Inside joke)

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 07, 2012 9:48 pm 
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HA...........My truck payment is due!

Here ..........kitty kitty

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“Preparing gives you choices, not preparing gives you absolutely nothing"


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 24, 2012 8:36 pm 
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You want it where? that will cost you a CASE of Spam! :shock:

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Lead, follow, or get out of the way. I don't care, just don't be on the cellphone when your doing it.
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2012 12:25 am 
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Location: Alabama-Land of low taxes, lots of guns and more meth labs than you can count!
Judge to Defendant- "You've been found guilty, this court sentences you to either 5 years, your woman or a case of spam. It's your choice, how say you?"

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The optimist learns English, a pessimist - Chinese, realist exploring a Kalashnikov rifle.-russian survival website
1911nufsaid wrote:
I'm not implying you, or anyone on the forum for that matter, is a 'end of world' nut job.

Woods Walker wrote:
If their shit was any tighter the carbon within would be turned to diamonds.

Put me down for AK, XD45 and Pie


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PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2012 2:04 am 
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Flying Lead wrote:
Judge to Defendant- "You've been found guilty, this court sentences you to either 5 years, your woman or a case of spam. It's your choice, how say you?"

"Judge, if you sentence me to 'my woman', can I be let off with time served? We've been together for 15 years and I think that's punishment enough."

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George Orwell wrote:
Power is not a means; it is an end. One does not establish a dictatorship in order to safeguard a revolution; one makes the revolution in order to establish the dictatorship. The object of persecution is persecution. The object of torture is torture. The object of power is power.


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PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2012 1:01 pm 
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Said by one cannibal to another at a circus, "Does this taste funny to you?"

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 29, 2012 2:11 am 
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We tried this new place the other nite, called the "Long Pig Cafe." Killer ribs, man.


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 29, 2012 12:20 pm 
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Hot dogs, get yer hot dogs... radioactive canine kabobs, get yer radioactive canine kabobs...Don't be the only kid in the neighborhood that still has all his hair... Hot dogs.... get yer hot dogs.....

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 29, 2012 3:01 pm 
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squinty wrote:
Flying Lead wrote:
Judge to Defendant- "You've been found guilty, this court sentences you to either 5 years, your woman or a case of spam. It's your choice, how say you?"

"Judge, if you sentence me to 'my woman', can I be let off with time served? We've been together for 15 years and I think that's punishment enough."


bu-dum-ching.


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2012 1:29 am 
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Location: Collinsville IL
Oh... my... Gawd! Did you see that? An EGG just came out of that chicken's BUTT! No, for real! And THESE people put all their potatoes in the ground, and got them all dirty!

See, they used to say I was homely. Now they say I'm 'sturdy'.

Wow, mom, look! We got walnuts AND coal in our stockings for Christmas!

Oh man, I had the most awesome thing for dinner over at the Johnsons. It's called 'head cheese'.

No wait! Don't use those magazines for toilet paper. Those are called 'porn'. They're worth a lot in trade.

No, they used to eat them back in the old days, too, but then, they called them 'squab'.

Yeah, seriously, people would work for a whole month to be able to get that ring with that little shiny rock.

How about these three buck knives and two cases of quart jars? Okay, look, let's stop messing around here. I'm willing to go as high as a set of Carhartt coveralls and that's it.

Really, it's better with a little cayenne. And maybe some garlic. And... (sobs)

There are two working cars for a hundred miles, and you two knuckleheads manage to run them into each other?


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2012 2:17 am 
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Location: The Far East
1. "It took some time to get used to but they keep you warm. No ma'am that's squirrel fur not mink. Best pair of underwear I've ever had."

2. "I think they're supposed to have three eyes-anyway they taste great on the grill."

3. "Ah look the horde is chasing that looter down the street. Anyone up for a quick game of hub-cap frisbee while they're gone?"

4. "I prefer the AR stocks to the AK ones for making war-clubs-you just seem to find more of them laying around."

5. "No Honey, Hagaan Daas never made MREs"

6. "Well you may call it 'Two zombies hooked to a plow' but I call it 'My Tractor'"

7. "The meat is coyote and the 'cheese'- we'd better not talk about that."

8. "Hey next time that Chinese submarine comes along remember to ask for extra soy-sauce.'

9. "Ah sunset-time for bed."

10. "Where should we visit this summer for the family vacation? The Giant Burnt Hole Filled with Melted Stuff or the Boiling Sea of Agony?"


Last edited by Cherokee John on Fri Mar 09, 2012 1:43 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2012 7:10 am 
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Location: Saguenay,Quebec Canada
"this chicken is so tasty"

"Dude! this can is from 1943"

"so ? it still taste like chicken"

"but it stroganoff beef"

"0_0"

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"We stopped to look for monster under the bed , the day we realized that they were inside us"


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2012 4:17 pm 
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Azzie, :lol: :lol: You nearly damaged my monitor with that

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I'm English, our Government doesn't trust us to have real guns........or decent pocket knives for that matter
Good job theres no such thing as a Trebuchet licence :D

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PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2012 4:23 pm 
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"Leave him alone!! Zombies are people, too!!"

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Feed science, not zombies!

“People had more than they needed. We had no idea what was precious and what wasn't. We threw away things people kill each other for now.” ~Book of Eli

∩(=^_^=)


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2012 5:46 pm 
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Anianna wrote:
"Leave him alone!! Zombies are were people, too!!"

FTFY


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2012 6:45 pm 
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*Beep*

This is a test from the Zombie Emergency Detection System. If this was an actual zombie emergency, the signal you just heard would be followed with instructions in the proper zombie removal procedures and safe house locations. This station serves the last remaining functional city on earth; Graceland. This concludes the Zombie Emergency Detection System (ZEDS). We now bring you back to your original programming.
*Beep*

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camlost wrote:
MonsterZero wrote:
When did this become a hunting expedition?


There's an unspoken belief among the users of this forum.
"That which was once dead should remain dead and should it once again walk the earth, duty decrees that it must be sent back from whence it came. Preferably in the most bad-ass way possible. "

I would assume this applies to dinosaurs.


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2012 7:27 pm 
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Tater Raider wrote:
Anianna wrote:
"Leave him alone!! Zombies are were people, too!!"

FTFY


No, no, the crazy nutjobs who would even think to say such a thing will absolutely say, "are".

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Feed science, not zombies!

“People had more than they needed. We had no idea what was precious and what wasn't. We threw away things people kill each other for now.” ~Book of Eli

∩(=^_^=)


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 08, 2012 7:32 pm 
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Location: Alabama-Land of low taxes, lots of guns and more meth labs than you can count!
Hot damn, we're having Haggis!!!

I got a can opener, with a three round burst.

Hey lookie, Jr made a laptop deadfall trap.

Rodent on a stick, just like the neighbors used to make before we ate them.

You voting this year?

Is it just me or does Don Imus actually look better as a zombie?

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The optimist learns English, a pessimist - Chinese, realist exploring a Kalashnikov rifle.-russian survival website
1911nufsaid wrote:
I'm not implying you, or anyone on the forum for that matter, is a 'end of world' nut job.

Woods Walker wrote:
If their shit was any tighter the carbon within would be turned to diamonds.

Put me down for AK, XD45 and Pie


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 1:18 am 
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"What's that rhythmic moaning?"
"Van Halen got back together."
"But Hollywood was one of the first areas to go!"
"You can't stop rock?"

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Now officially an Arkansasshole.


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 1:27 am 
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Thread reminds me of this cartoon. Sure it's been posted before, but still - you might hear this (NSFW) conversation in the PAW:


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George Orwell wrote:
Power is not a means; it is an end. One does not establish a dictatorship in order to safeguard a revolution; one makes the revolution in order to establish the dictatorship. The object of persecution is persecution. The object of torture is torture. The object of power is power.


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